The Early Years

The Early Years is a collection of my acoustic guitar ballads and instrumental demos written between 1975-1998. Almost everyone agrees these are my best songs – at least in terms of melody and lyrics with emotional impact. “Out There” is the best sounding recording so you might want to check that one out.

Song Lyrics

I wrote this one 2 years after I started playing guitar, for my son’s mother after she left.

"Just Because"
By Koda

Just because I'm breathing
I want to know why there's air
Just because I'm dreaming
I want to know why they're there
Just because there's nothing
It doesn't mean there's nothing there
Just because it's over
It doesn't mean that I don't care

Just because I don't think the way you do
It doesn't mean that I'm not true
to the kind of dreams we knew
Just because I'm still learning who to be
It doesn't mean that I'm not me
I'm still who I want to be

And if you find that I'm not perfect
If I'm not who you thought I was
Well, who I am is simply different,
Just because
I don't feel the way you do
It doesn't mean that I'm not true
To the kind of dreams we knew

Just because

My first and only attempt to write a country song, which turned out to be one of my best.

"Too Many Tears"
By Koda

We've been together
for such a long time
it's hard recalling when we were not.
We'll be friends forever
we've known that from the start
but we keep falling apart.

I know how much you love me
when you say it's no one's fault
still it's me that makes you cry.
These words spoke in anger
just tear out our hearts
and too many tears have fallen from your eyes.

You are the fountain that fills up my life
i'd be so empty if you were gone.
I do all I can to make everything right
but then I say something wrong.

We go to the bedroom and each take our side
we don't touch all through the night.
I stare at the ceiling and listen to you cry
it's time to set our lives right

"Cause too many tears
have fallen from your eyes
so let me hold you tonight
we'll pretend it's alright
and hold back the fears
and hope for more years
Without too many tears.

Too Many Tears

I have fallen in love with two significantly overweight women during my life (which I will never do again because I am too obsessed with beautiful women). This is about being in love in spite of oneself.

"Nothin' Special"
By Koda

It's not the way she holds me
it's the way that I feel held
It's not the way she touches me
it's what those touches tell

There's nothing special about the way she looks
until she looks at me
then the whole damned world can go to hell
while heaven holds me in her gaze

I don¹t call that nothin' special

It's not the things she tells me
it's that she tells me all she feels
It's not the fact she loves me
but the way she makes our love real

Yeah to you she's nothing special
but you don't see the soul I see
Yeah so what she's nothing special
but she's everything to me

I don¹t call that nothin' special

Nothin' Special

I've done way too much of the long distance relationship stuff. . .

"I Want You Here"
By Koda

I sigh at the thought of your smile
As you hug your self 'cause I'm not there
There's far more between us than miles
Darling I want you here.

The nights spent alone pass so slowly
I still hear your voice in my ear
The phone felt so cold when you told me
Darling I want you here.

I Want You Here

I met a woman in a coffee shop and fell in love, but she was engaged and broke things off with me after a week, before anything really happened. But the event was intense enough to inspire this song. I saw her ten years later. She said she was divorced so I gave her my card, but never heard from her again.

"When I Lost You"
By Koda

I couldn't understand
How the Earth kept turning
How the flowers and the grass still grew
Why the stars in the sky kept turning
Didn't they know it all ended
When I lost you

You told me you loved me
Through eyes so wet and blue
But he had your commitment
And that meant that we were through

I couldn't understand
How you could ever love me
If you loved him like I do you
I couldn't understand
How you could ever leave me
Not loving me the way you do

I touched your hand and your body trembled
And your eyes fell to the floor
The tears ran as you hugged me briefly
Then my world ran out the door

And I couldn't understand
How the Earth kept turning
How the flowers and the grass still grew
Why the stars in the sky kept burning
Didn't they know it all ended
When I lost you

When I Lost You

I've seen numerous important projects in my life fail miserably, and if it's true that one learns more from failure than success, I must be one of the wisest people on earth 🙂  "Late Autumn" acknowledges how devastating failure can be, but ends with quiet encouragement to keep plodding on.

"Late Autumn"
By Koda

The nights are cold now
The leaves are down
The clouds hang lower
The lawns are brown

Another year wasted
Another dream in the dirt
I guess it¹s all in the growing
'Guess not all trees were meant to bear fruit

My breaths are clouds now
Sighs, filling the sky
I've been so long living with this longing
So long to another year gone by

But it's no use complaining
This smile was the goal of all that work
Late autumn has a way of explaining
How not all trees were meant to bear fruit

Late Autumn

This song was inspired by a moment alone standing in the driveway one night, looking up at the moonlit clouds and thinking that the woman I would spend the rest of my life with might be out there somewhere looking up at the Moon at that same moment. The vocal performance was done by Kirsten Arce-Loretta, with Darren Weight helping with the arrangement.

"Out There"
By Koda

I can't hear you
But I can tell
You're singing with me
I can't touch you
But I can feel
You dancing with me

I haven't met you
But I can't forget you
'Cause I know that you're out there
Waiting for me . . .
Seems like eternity

Outside alone, in the night
Moonlit clouds up in the heights
It's the same moon we see
That shines its light on you and me
Makes me feel, how you're out there still

You're out there, thinking of me now

I know I've got to be all me
All by myself
Still I know how I long to be one
With someone else

I haven't met you
But I can't forget you
'Cause I know that you're out there
Waiting for me . . .

You're out there, thinking of me now

Out There